Tyler was the guy who asked me on a first date that Monday. I had met him the week before Thanksgiving at a club meeting. It’s basically a club for people who work in marketing. There is always a speaker or two at these meetings. This particular meeting was going a little slow for me, and I had got up to use the restroom. We were in a different facility this month that had a huge meeting room and a separate bar area. The restroom was right next to the bar. A few club members were seated there. When I came out of the restroom a girl at the bar waved enthusiastically to me and seemed to remember me. At that moment I couldn’t remember anything about her. We said hello, and she introduced me to the two guys she was sitting with at the bar. I pulled up a chair on the end next to one of the guys. The four of us talked about the meeting, and the guy I was sitting next to ordered a round of drinks for us. The conversation soon changed to the girl just talking to the guy next to her and me talking to the guy next to me. We talked about our jobs for awhile, and it eventually led into talking about our families, our pets, and our last relationships.
After an hour of this I realized he liked me. I thought we were just talking because we work in the same field. But I suddenly saw it in his face. He was cute, so I enjoyed it. Eventually I figured I should get home and get to bed since I had work in the morning. He offered to walk me to my car. We said goodbye to the other two, and as we stood up I realized he was shorter than I had thought. He was right around my height, just like Jay. This definitely wasn’t something I was used to, but I found it interesting. As we walked outside, he asked for my number. I told him the number and he typed it into his iPhone. We got to my car and he hugged me before I got in. On the drive home I called Sophie to brag about meeting someone.
Tyler text messaged me soon after I got home to tell me he’d had a great time talking to me and that he hoped my cats were doing well. I smiled to myself and told him good night, and that I hoped his puppy was doing well. Between then and him asking me on the date after Thanksgiving we’d had one phone conversation and several text messages. He was now officially asking me on a date. I was a little thrown off by this. I mean, I wasn’t surprised, but things had just started moving along with Jay, so I was unsure of what to do. Nevertheless, Jay had said we weren’t in a relationship, so I figured I may as well go and get to know someone new. I debated telling Jay about it all afternoon. Sadly, my dad’s advice on this sort of matter is: “Don’t tell them about each other.”
I called Jay after work and asked him if he was okay with me going on this date. He sounded super okay about it and said he appreciated that I talked to him about it first. But then he started giving me advice about dating, which felt extremely awkward. Example: “If you go to his house, or let him into yours, he will expect sex.” This was one of those times where I could feel the age difference between us. As the week went by, he also told me that I should kiss Tyler, that he would understand, and that I may as well find out if it’s nice. Super awkward.
The date was planned for Thursday night. We decided to go to Studio Movie Grill for dinner and a movie. The choice movie ended up being Love & Other Drugs. I felt nervous during the day on Thursday, and the nervousness only went up the closer it got to date time. I hadn’t been on an official date in a very long time. I haven’t actually been on many. I usually meet a guy randomly and then we just start hanging out constantly and become a couple.
But my biggest fear about the date was that I could end up really liking him. I didn’t want to be in the ‘I like two guys’ situation. But I also didn’t want to close the door to opportunities. Don’t get me wrong – I was loving the ‘being single, doing what I want’ thing. I didn’t like the idea of getting serious any time soon. I had got to the point of being tired of and scared of failed relationships. But the hopeless romantic part of me was open to a serious relationship if I met the right person. Plus, I loved being asked out on a date.
It took me a while to find Studio Movie Grill that night. I hadn’t been to that location before. During the day, he had told me he’s known for being late. But he beat me there. I saw him standing outside the theater as I got out of my car. There was the awkward, “Does he see me yet? Do I look ok? Do I lock eyes with him as I walk up?” I felt so awkward about being on a date. I just don’t know how to act in those situations. I even feel awkward reliving it right now.
He was friendly though and acted very gentlemanly. After we seated ourselves in the theater, we dug through the menu. I chose a meal that didn’t sound too messy – margherita pizza – and a cherry slushie with liquor. The cherry slushie was to die for good, but it cost $9. During the movie we ate our dinner, and I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye several times. I kept thinking, “Should I try to hold hands with him?” It’s so awkward going to a movie with someone you like for the first time and wondering if you should hold hands, and when would be a good time to reach over, and do you slowly touch his/her arm or hand first before holding hands. Near the end of the movie, he finally reached over, slowly caressing my arm, then my hand, and then holding my hand.
After the movie we walked out to the parking lot not quite ready to leave. We discussed getting drinks, and decided to walk over to a Mexican restaurant across the parking lot. I was freezing, and he put his coat over my shoulders. (Awww.) We sat at the bar and talked for awhile. I had two margaritas and he had two Bud Lights. We laughed at this guy dancing funny in the bar and he secretly took a video of the guy to post to his Facebook. Later, some little kids were in there looking at the jukebox and leaning on the back of his chair touching his coat. Once they walked away, he asked, “Is it bad I don’t want kids touching my coat?” I laughed and said, “Kids have sticky hands!” He explained that he had just bought the coat this week. We talked about stuff we did in high school and college, crazy parties we’ve been at, things we tried to get away with in high school, car wrecks we’ve been in, a little bit about past relationships. I enjoyed myself.
Finally I decided I’d probably had enough to drink. He walked me to my car, but then I pouted and said I hadn’t seen his car yet. He pointed it out and we walked to it. It was a newer Nissan Maxima. I looked in the window and oohed and ahhed. He opened the passenger door and said to sit down. The inside was much warmer than the cold outside air. He walked around and got in the driver’s seat. Upon sitting down, he said, “I figure we can take a minute to sober up.” I agreed. We chatted for a minute and then he suddenly leaned over and kissed me. This quickly turned into full fledged making out session for a good half hour. We even crawled into the backseat to make out. We joked that it was like we were in high school again. I truly hadn’t had a make out session like that since high school. By the end of our session I was completely sobered up.